By: Jonias

How do y’all have so many friends? I don’t know if it is me, or what but I struggle making and developing friendships. I get really lonely a lot because I feel like I don’t have strong friends to bond with. I get so jealous when I am on social media seeing people enjoying true connections and living life with their friends. I be wanting to go out and do things, but I end up stopping myself because I feel like I am going to look stupid doing it by myself. I want to do brunch, karaoke, movies, travel, and other fun stuff, but I don’t want to do it alone. I don’t know if you respond to these, but I really need help/want to know how do people put themselves out there to make friends.

From Nini:

So usually I don’t respond because I want people to be able to express themselves freely without guilt, pressure, or persuasion, but I definitely don’t mind responding if you like me to!!

I completely understand how you feel 100%. Growing up I struggled maintaining friendships due to how much I used to isolate myself and struggling with my mental health. Some times I still struggle to put myself out there to make friends, so maybe we can go on this journey together. First I just want to say that now you have one new friend, me lol. I love to exchange funny memes, go hiking, and going on random adventures. Second, know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with going out and having fun by yourself. Going out alone is actually one of my favorite things to do. I designate moments of going out alone as self care days, because to me it is all about enjoying myself and making the most out of the moment. It is my way of reconnecting to self. Have you ever tried finding local outings as a way of networking with others? For example I live in Charlotte and there are always fun local activities going on with nice turnouts. I use those events as a way of getting out and getting to know new people. Challenge and push yourself to get out there and meet new people. If you are shy honey start reciting some confidence boosting affirmations. Say hello to someone first, find a common interest and start a conversation. Give someone a random compliment. And know that it is ok to take baby steps. I only have a handful of close friends and that is perfectly fine with me, because the few friends that I have make up my tribe. They are always there when I need them, I am never judged, and I know that whenever I am not feeling my strongest mentally, they will always be there to keep me lifted. And for that I will always choose quality over quantity. Good luck on your journey, and email me to let me know your progress.